Tuesday, March 4, 2008

These Boots are made for...

Nancy Sinatra??
Okay, truth be told I don't look that good in boots anyway, something to do with chunky calves apparently.
So I have this husband, I guess he never checked the ankles, and this husband has the equivalent of a huge, hairy mole. The mole is called Wickhead and it involves four other slacker musician types, which poses frequent problems that no amount of Jack Daniels or Tarantino could ever hope to fix. My current problem is somewhat marxist - Richard Marx-ist, he is based in LA, I am stuck at home raising hell, and an adorable three year old. I know an old lady who is overly fond of the phrase "I'm a modern woman and ... [insert thoroughly outdated ideology here]" so that is what instantly pops up in my wee brain, neon lights glowing menacingly. I'm no modern woman, give me a little shop of horrors style Audrey dream any day - I want a picket fence, a pinesol scented living room and a Chevy Impala. My darling absent husband can't offer me this, right now he cant offer me anything and if I was Nancy maybe I'd walk, but my chunky calves are strangely reticent. Look, don't get me wrong, I'm just as keen on masturbation as the next guy, but at some point it's going to get a little old.
Millenium Hand and Shrimp.
I'm off to bed, and I'm packing the angry eyes...

1 comment:

Cast the First Stone -- said...

have you heard of Good Vibrations? i think they may have a website... (wink.wink.)